Sinclair Sexsmith (Sugarbutch Chronicles) is launching a project centering around masculine of center gender identities. Sinclair says it is
to promote a greater understanding of masculine of center gender identities, expressions, and presentations, through encouraging: 1. visibility, because we feel alone; 2. solidarity, because there are many of us out there, but we don’t always communicate with each other; and 3. an elevation of the discussion, because we have a long history and lineage to explore and we don’t have to reinvent the wheel.
She invited writers and bloggers to participate in a symposium on butch identity. The questions for the first symposium are: What is butch? How do you define butch? What do you love about it? What does it mean to you?
I’ve written about being butch before but I think it’s always useful to periodically re-visit labels and write out their meanings in different ways. It makes them deeper and fuller as well as giving me a better understanding of who I am. So my answers to the questions are;
What is butch?
Butch for me is having the strength to be true to the inner voice which guides me while ignoring outside influences which try to dictate how I should be. It’s the name for all the feelings and desires which have been with me since birth. It’s the label that most completely captures the essence of who I am and who I want to be.
How do you define butch?
There are moments when somehow everything that’s right for me comes together, attitude, clothes, emotions, the whole works. Those moments are when I’m at my prime, when I’m being me at my best and when I feel almost invincible. That’s how I’d define butch.
What do you love about it?
I love taking what I perceive to be the best bits of masculinity and putting them into practice, such as chivalry and courteousness. I love opening doors, carrying bags, being called a gent and generally attempting to display as many ‘old fashioned’ good manners as possible. I also love the clothes and accessories, suits, ties, cufflinks, waistcoats etc. It’s all of that which makes the blood in my veins run thicker and stronger.
What does it mean to you?
It means being me and showing the world that it’s perfectly acceptable and right to be me without apology or explanation. It means freedom.
butch, gentleman, genderqueer, married and monogamous, queer, stone, top, transmasculine
i’m so glad i saw this on my tag surfer, ima go do it now …
I’m glad Sinclair put the call out on this. I think we’re going to learn a lot about each other and about different perspectives on a very familiar word. We each have our own way of relating to ‘butch’, based on our history, our needs and all that.
I have a feeling as I read post by others, I’ll find things I missed. I like this from yours especially:
“It means being me and showing the world that it’s perfectly acceptable and right to be me without apology or explanation. It means freedom.”
Hell yeah, brother, freedom.
I love reading how different butch is for each of you. This is great.
Right? So different for everyone–with each post I read, the “label” becomes more open and well-rounded. Though if this were Twitter, #cufflinks would be trending. :0)
Also, great post! You’re a rockstar!
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“There are moments when somehow everything that’s right for me comes together, attitude, clothes, emotions, the whole works. Those moments are when I’m at my prime, when I’m being me at my best and when I feel almost invincible. That’s how I’d define butch.”
I love those moments, I wish I had them more often.
Holden, I just love you.
I’m only half being cutesy when I say that. You were one of the first butch bloggers I read that broke down your identity so thoughtfully, so consciously. Your writing about who you are always strikes home for me, and always makes me think. Coming from your opposite on the spectrum, your insights have proven, over and over, to make me explore my own identity, privilege, and responsibility to my “other half” of queer gender.
Your visibility, all you butches, makes ours easier to achieve. Thank you for being our face, and thank you for using your voice.
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“It means being me and showing the world that it’s perfectly acceptable and right to be me without apology or explanation. It means freedom.”
Absolute freedom. Well said. Very well said.
I so wish Li and I had not missed out on the first butch symposium. Life has been oh-so-busy lately (as you know from e-mails) and I miss the days when we both had more time to write. Your post sounded so familiar–so much like something Li would have said. This, of course, does not strike me as odd since I thoroughly believe you two are brothers from another mother. The hardest road to take is the one you have chosen–to walk the streets with your chivalry and your suits and no apologies. I’m so proud of you and of all the butches who choose to carry on and be yourselves so that those of us who love you can do so with total pride. Carry on…carry on.
(((((hugs)))))
Di